Last week I received a reminder of the upcoming Holistic Chamber of Commerce conference in Manhattan Beach, CA. While the conference was appealing because it advertises and will provide tremendous content that I could apply to my business, I did not intend on attending. California is quite the hike!
But when I heard my phone buzz and saw the reminder e-mail, something caused me to click the link to find out more. Perhaps it was because I had twenty minutes to kill before my next client arrived. Perhaps it was the curiosity to see who they had added to their speaking line up. Perhaps it was the universe prodding me. Whatever it was, I clicked the link.
If you’ve been following this Blog for a few years or you’ve binge read my postings, you’ve read “Psychic Fairs.. Not What You Expect.” In that posting from a few years ago, I shared why I decided to take a break from the psychic fair scene.
Prior to that time, I like had participated in psychic, metaphysical and holistic events to promote my business. It is what I did and I encourage any aspiring medium or healer to do. Working the fair circuit is the most effective way to establish yourself as a reader or healer as it fosters credibility and facilitates name recognition. If you haven’t read my prior blog, you may now be asking “why did you quit?” I needed to shift my priorities. The fairs are ridden with drama, something I no longer wanted to surround myself with. Additionally, with the birth of my daughter I wanted more time to spend with my family. By not participating in the fairs, my schedule has become more relaxed and structured AND I’ve had time to focus on endeavors such as my book.
Leaving the fairs, in my opinion was the best decision I could have made at the time. Since leaving, I’ve been contacted by many promoters seeing if I would like to participate in their event. Other than a couple charity events, I have declined.
It is because of all those reasons, I find myself filled with trepidation as I feel the tide shifting as I enter into a new phase of business. As I increase my presence as an inspirational speaker and author in addition to a practicing medium, I realized it was time to return to the fair and expo environment I left behind. This past weekend was my first foray back. Fortunately, there are a number of differences this time around.
For one, I’m not trying to break into the holistic field and make a name for myself. I’ve been in the business for ten years. I’m established. This might not matter much to the promoters, the other vendors or the patrons of the event, but it is important to me. Over the past ten years, especially the last three, I’ve proven to myself that I really can have a successful career as a medium. As a result, I’m comfortable and confident in my skin. I’ve got nothing to prove to anyone, let alone myself… which was what I was really doing back in the day.
Due to this comfort and confidence, the competition, cattiness and drama that I have seen accompany the fair circuit is less likely to impact me. For one, I don’t intend on doing the fairs, as many reader do, to make money from readings. Rather, I intend to promote my book One and further my mission of normalizing mediumship. Because I’m not offering readings, I’m not in direct competition with anyone.
More importantly than not being in direct competition with anyone, I have grown to a point I don’t really care what other people think of me. I KNOW there are and will be people who don’t resonate with me or my message. I’m OK with that. I don’t have to win over everyone. The only person I have to win over and that has to be ok with me is ME. I have to live with my truth and my actions. Realizing this, has made such a difference. I just have to be me!! What is easier than that?
Because of these realizations, my entry back into the fairs was more fun than I expected. I look forward to sharing the message of One further.
After a reading recently, a client asked if she could take a few moments and ask about me. She, like many, asked how I receive information from the other side. Because this is a question I get a lot, I figured it would be a good topic for a Blog.
Before I can talk about how I perceive the information, let me first start clear up where the information comes from. As a medium, I connect with both your loved ones (deceased family members and friends) and the universe (spirit guides, guardian angels, etc.). Why do I choose to connect with both your loved ones and your guides? Well, I can. And more importantly, by doing so it provides you with greater insight. Your loved ones bringing through specific details about themselves provide concrete evidence that I am connecting with the other side and you. Knowing that your loved ones are with you can be comforting and bring closure. The reason I don’t limit myself to your loved ones however is that loved ones are limited to their opinions and insights. So while they offer loving advice, it doesn’t always mean it is good advice. That is where your guides and angels can step in. Since they know not only what you want but where you are meant to be, they can help guide you towards your life’s purpose.
Now that you are clear on the who, I can explain the how. Explaining the who was important because how I receive information is different depending on where it is coming from. I’ll start by describing what it feels like to receive information from your loved ones.
As a clairvoyant, I SEE your loved ones. When they step in with you they look a little like holograms. They have the shape and dimension, but it is evident they don’t have mass. I can shift my focus to look at their features and when I do the details become crisper. Often the loved one will guide me to specific features such as putting out their hands for me to look at or fluffing their hair. Similarly, they may give me an object or something to hold, look at. Similarly, if they are passing a message, I will sometimes see the message conveyed like a movie in my head. Hence why I tend to use a lot of analogies and metaphors.
Because clairaudience, the ability to hear, is not one of my strongest I do not hear what they have to say. If I do hear, it is similar to my voice in the back of my head and I will hear a tune or a name.
Clairsentience and clairempathy, meaning I feel their emotions and ailments rounds out the messages. And sometimes, I just know. That’s claircognizance – there is no explaining it.
This is different than when I receive messages from your guides. The messages from your loved ones are very heavy of the visual messages. And while I CAN see your guides/angels and the messages they pass, I rarely do. Why? Because their form is irrelevant. Unless you are like myself, who has developed a clear vision of your guide I could tell you they look like anything. Additionally, your guides aren’t around for them (like your loved ones are) they are present to pass a message. Hence when guides step in it is an unshakeable knowing.
You may be wondering if both guides and loved ones come in with a knowing, how do I tell the difference? And more importantly, how do I know it’s not just my opinion?
Let me first address the question of my opinion. I know it is not my opinion because I rarely have enough information to form an opinion. I don’t see my clients that much. I don’t remember details of their readings. So, I don’t have enough to form an opinion. And if I do hear my opinion, it is in my own voice and is similar to the dialogue I have with myself in my head. It sounds and feels different.
Loved ones and spirit guides also feel and sound different. Loved ones, because they are still evolving, have a heavier vibration than your guides. Think of it like the vibration that accompanies the sound of a timpani drum. Whereas the feeling of the universe through your guides or angels is more similar to the vibration that accompanies the sound of a piccolo.
In addition to that, your loved ones will waffle on their opinions, your guides will not. Your guides speak with conviction. They may offer alternative solutions, but they always come back to a truth and conviction.
That’s how I get my information. I hope this gives an insight into my world, and something to think about for you emerging mediums. Remember every individual will perceive the information in a slightly different way.
During a recent session, after passing a message I could tell the client didn’t like I off-handedly said, “You know I could be wrong.” This is my way of reminding the client that I am not perfect, I do misinterpret information and that he or she has free will, nothing is set in stone.
I share this information with everyone in my spiel before I start reading, so I was a little surprised when she followed my statement up with, “Are you often wrong?”
It was a fair question. A question I know my husband, who does all my booking, gets often from folks inquiring about an appointment. Unfortunately, it is a hard question to answer. And although I know there are readers out there who report an accuracy rate, usually between 92.5% and 98%, on their websites, I’m not one of them. Why? I have no idea how to obtain that number.
I conduct over a thousand individual sessions a year. I don’t know what happens after many of those readings. It makes me wonder if the readers who advertise an accuracy rate, how did they get to that number. Did they simply conduct an exit interview asking in that moment? That doesn’t seem representative of an accuracy rate. Did they follow up with each of their clients? That seems daunting? Or did they opt to take a small sample group and conduct a longitudinal study following that group?
A sample group seems do-able. But then the scientist in me (thank you Allegheny) asks, how many people are in that sample? Is it one or two? Or is a fair sample size of 50 to 100? Again, this begins to become daunting. Is the group representative? Meaning, does it contain a mix of men and women, age ranges, exposure to the spiritual world, ethnic backgrounds, etc. Or is it a small select group of a niche population? The more diverse the group, the more representative that rate is. Lastly, I wonder how many times that small group is followed? Are they asked once after six months? Or are they followed for a longer span of time? The longer they are followed, again the more representative.
Thinking of setting up the experiment makes my head spin!! That’s why it is unlikely I will ever tout an accuracy rate and why I have a hard time answering the question. I honestly don’t know if I am right 50% of the time or 96% of the time or even if it is only 10% of the time. I actually don’t know if anyone can truly know.
In fact, sometimes it is better to be wrong than be right. A reading isn’t meant to tell you want to do. It’s meant to be inspirational, give you hope and get you thinking about what YOU want in your life. It is a glimpse of a snapshot in your life at this moment. As I mentioned at the start of this article, you have free will. With that, it makes it possible that what I see will change.
So, what makes me trust that I’m right, or at least inspirational, most of the time? I have a number of repeat clients. I do keep statistics on that information. In a day, about 2/3rds of my clients are returning. Today is a perfect example. I have six clients. Five are repeats. The last one, is a referral. To be a repeat client or a referral means I must have done something right. It’s why I keep doing what I’m doing.
Because of all of this, I’m not overly concerned with my accuracy rate. It is also why I am somewhat skeptical of people who tout a rate. If you are looking for a reader, ask your friends or family who they have seen and liked. That’s how you will find your best reader.
One: Unleashing the Energy that Connects Us All is at the printer. Special edition pre-orders will be mailed out within the week. The party to celebrate the book release is a little more than three weeks away.
Why throw a party for One?
Selfishly, the completion of One is an accomplishment I am proud of ME. My academic pursuits didn’t go as planned. When I graduated from college, it went by relatively unnoticed. I didn’t celebrate it. I didn’t feel I needed to or wanted to.
If you’ve read my blogs, you know my college career was interrupted by a car accident. After working to regain my physical health, I returned to school at SUNY Empire State College and I picked away at my remaining courses. I worked on my degree while working full time and building my business on the side, so the passion I once had for my classes wasn’t present. I worked towards the degree not because I had a desire to learn, but because I felt I needed the degree. We live in a society where that piece of paper, for better or worse, opens doors.
I was further disconnected to the investment in the degree as Empire State is an online school. As such, my entire degree was completed virtually. I didn’t know my classmates. I didn’t know my professors. I didn’t even know my mentor. Compared to my time at Allegheny, where I had amazing relationships with my classmates, my professors, my hallmates, my sisters, the college community, the experience I had completing my degree was impersonal. If I had chosen to walk, I would have been walking with strangers. That didn’t appeal to me.
So, when my diploma arrived, my husband and I opened a bottle of wine and toasted. The diploma was then filed away and my life continued.
This is different. It is my work of art. It is my physical demonstration, much like a degree, of my hard work. In some ways, for me this represents my value. And, I want to celebrate that. I want to celebrate my Oneness.
But, unlike at Empire State where I didn’t feel connected to my peers nor did I feel their investment with me, when it comes to One – I feel a connection to each of you (emotional intuition), connection to the environment and world around me (physical intuition) and my connection to the universe (spiritual intuition), I want to celebrate that Oneness. That is what this book is about, at least in part, after all.
Without connection, this book wouldn’t exist. Without the support and encouragement of each of you, I wouldn’t have written the book. Without the guidance from the universe, I’d still be looking at a blank sheet of paper. For these reasons, and so many more, I want to celebrate the You and the One that connects us all.
If you are free on June 29th from 6pm – 9pm, please come out to the Tewksbury Lodge at 249 Ohio Street, Buffalo 14204. Feel free to drop in and filter out. Wine and beer will be on the house, so please RSVP. Additionally, there will be food, giveaways and good times.
If you aren’t able to attend, check out Facebook. I will be Live Streaming the event.
Being in the right place at the right time is something I love about being a medium. It makes my life easier as I don’t have to take extra time to run from here to there and coordinate efforts.
Let’s use this example that occurred yesterday to demonstrate the point.
As the Book Release Party is just around the corner (June 29th – RSVP here), I was excited when my flyers and postcards announcing the event arrived from the printer in yesterday’s mail. With these in hand and the book at the printer, I can send out press kits and invitations, and promote the heck out of this event. I’m planning on an EPIC party.
One of the first places I needed to get advertising out was at WillowLight. After looking at the calendar and seeing that there are several events before I planned on being in the office next, I decided my husband and I would swing by before we grabbed my daughter from the sitter.
On the way down the road, my husband asked, “Do you want to stop at WillowLight first? Or, would you prefer we run our errands near the mall and then hit the offices before we grab Baby Girl?”
It didn’t matter to me, so my husband decided stating, “I don’t know why, but I think we should do our shopping first.”
This was an opportune decision. When we pulled into WillowLight, we were surprised to see a full parking lot as there was nothing on the calendar. Turns out, Buffalo Underground had a pet communicator in and the class had just let out. Perfect timing as it allowed me to bump into Judy Hartke (the owner of WillowLight) AND Melanie (Buffalo Underground). Both were people I wanted to get the invitations in the hands of. Judy, because as a co-sponsor she is helping to promote the event. Melanie, because I wanted to make sure she was personally invited to the shin-dig.
Talk about being in the right place at the right time! Had we not swung by or swung by earlier, we would have missed both. By arriving when we did, I was saved from running around. Thank you, Don, for listening to your intuition… see it’s not just me who is a medium. Everyone is!
I’m writing this blog as I sit in my temporary office space at Santosha. If you have watched this video, you know that I am here because my home office is currently being remodeled. From that video, you may also know that Santosha is located in the same space that had once been my midwife’s office.
It is interesting sitting here. The year I was pregnant, I spent A LOT of time in this office. For those who have been pregnant, you know there are a lot of appointments with the provider. Once a month, then every other week, and the last month once a week… which after my due date was every couple of days. During each of those visits, my husband and I spent an hour conversing with our midwife – yes a WHOLE hour, the beauty of my provider’s model of care – while she alleviated any fears and checked the progress of the little one. But, now while I observe the space, it feels odd… not bad, just different.
It isn’t because the physical space has changed all that much. A wall has been put up to create an office where my midwife’s desk had once been. That’s about the only change. In fact, I think the colors are the same! The energy however, is much different.
I attribute this to both Khristeena Kingsley (my midwife) and Angela Hewett-Abt along with Don Scott (the proprietors of Santosha). Each of them have put their hearts and souls into this place to ensure the energy of the space meets their needs and expectations. And it shows.
Recognizing that got me thinking about my own office space. It is a blank canvas for which I can create any energy I desire. Fortunately, there is already a lot of good juju in the space. I have been doing readings out of it for seven years after all. But with the renovation there is time for rejuvenation.
The first comes with color. The one painted wall had been green. And while color doesn’t need to change to create new energy, as you know I thought my new space called for a new color and you guys got to choose! You spoke, I’m listening. I will be doing an accent wall in Rare Wine, a deep plum, and Grey Screen will cover the remaining walls. Plum is a wonderful color as it aligns with the third eye and crown chakra which will facilitate intuition. Great color for the space.
Before I (or rather my contractor, PDQ gets to painting), I will write my intentions and hopes for the space on the walls. Terms like serenity, healing and intuition will be scrawled. By doing this, I am physically setting the intention. It’s a little thing, but it is amazing what it does.
Once the room is completed, I will focus my attention to the flow of energy. When the furniture goes in, I will make sure neither I nor my client’s back will be facing the door.
I’ll also pay attention to the décor. Crystals will be placed, subtly as I’m not a crystal junkie – my husband takes that title. I’ll make sure my fairy house is placed to the faeries liking. And any other accents I feel will be sprinkled throughout. I’m thinking I might be doing a run to Pier One for some throw pillows.
Finally, the space won’t be ready to go until I bless it. I will go through and smudge, because smudging is not just about removing negative energy it is also about bringing in the positive.
Come to think of it, I could christen it by smashing a bottle of champagne like they do with a boat. Naw, that’s a waste of a good drink instead I think I might just pop a cork.
Have you made your space your own? If so, how?
When I started writing, the book I intended on penning looked NOTHING like the book it has become. At the time, I intended on writing about the basics of mediumship – grounding, protecting, centering and listening.
Why did I think I was going to write about the basics? There were several reasons which included:
But, alas, that book was not meant to be… this time at least. And, don’t worry… I didn’t scrap the copy. Rather, that material was put in a parking lot for another book. In fact, even upon the last review of this book two whole chapters got cut and pushed into a future book!
So why did I change the premise of the first book?
Well the premise of the book never actually changed. When I set out to write the book it was with the objective of writing to engage individuals who don’t think they are mediums. I wanted to reach the people who are “spiritual but not religious” and the people searching for something and aren’t sure to what or where to go. More importantly, I want to normalize mediumship by demonstrating EVERYONE is a medium. Unfortunately, I quickly realized this is something the basics would not do. Why? It’s simple. While I believe everyone is a medium. Yes – You and You and You and You – not everyone believes they are.
Realizing this, I was stumped. How do I do that? Fortunately, my days in health care consumer engagement flashed before my eyes. As I reflected upon that work, I recalled that consumers could be divided into four categories: Phase One, the deer in the headlight who knew nothing about the topic and needed to be made aware; Phase Two, the individual who was aware but who lacked education; Phase Three, the folks who are engaged and want to take action, but just need a little assistance as they modify and adopt new behaviors; and, Phase Four, the individuals who are already doing it but might need a little assistance in maintaining their way of life. Upon remembering this, I smiled as I noted that everything we do in life prepares us for something. I also, I realized the book about basics would engage individuals in stages three and four. Not my target audience.
So, before I could write a book about developing that intuition, even if it was a book about the basics, I needed to first write a book for the people still searching to figure it out. But what would engage people in stage one and two? That’s when I realized I would need to describe not only why one would want to use their intuition, but more importantly how it works. By describing how it works, I’m able to demonstrate why mediumship is not reserved for the special few but is something that is within us all.
I would have been remiss, however, to leave this information without simple things to be aware of to enhance their intuition and trust it.
And with that, One was born. Had I wrote the basics book first, those with an aversion to mediumship would have dismissed it and perhaps other books. One opens the door for them.
One place the muses like to talk to me is in the shower.
If you watched this video, you know that the shower is a great place to receive messages. Not only is it one of the few times during the day when I have time for ME and MY thoughts, but water is also a great conductor of spiritual energies.
Throughout my life, the conviction to move forward with important or creative decisions have always come to me while in the shower. For example, it was in the shower when I knew that my husband and I would find the house of our dreams. After the shower, I hopped online to search the MLS listings. Sure enough, there was our house. It was also in the shower when I had the inspiration for Where Is Dawn Lynn? The stroke of genius that occurred in those situations happen about once a month.
That is until about two months ago. Since then, the muses have been working overtime. Every Single Time I hit the shower, my to-do list gets longer. In fact, my husband has told me he likes my stink and perhaps I should go longer between showers… I think he just doesn’t want HIS to-do list to get longer.
Wondering what some of these inspirations have been? Here are a few examples:
100 Videos in 100 Days
My husband had ordered me the book, Known by Mark Schaefer, for either my birthday or Valentine’s Day. I was in the midst of reading that. While in the shower I realized I needed more consistency in my YouTube presence and thought, huh? 100 videos in 100 days. I can do that! Told my husband the day it started… might be one of the reasons he would prefer I don’t shower, it tripled his work load.
The Book Launch
Shortly after starting the 100 videos in 100 days, I was inspired to launch One: Unleashing the Energy that Connects Us All. The book itself wasn’t a new concept. I’d been working on it for about a year. But, the moment the inspiration struck I had no plan on when to release it. But, I was inspired to use the momentum of the 100 days for the book. Also, what better way to mark the end of the 100 days than with a party?
Handbook and Meditation CD
Once I was committed to the book launch, that little voice spoke again. This time it nudged me to create a supplemental handbook and meditation cd. Both make a lot of sense. In fact, my one reviewer recommended that the exercises be highlighted in the back of the book. And, I had been thinking about recording meditations in the past. Hadn’t planned on it for the book… but it makes sense. I’ve got the content. It will be a little... okay, a lot more work. But, I’m doing it.
Not sure I’m going to put this one into action or not, but because the premise of the book as the tag-ling suggests is energetic connections, I was hit with the idea of placing a couple books in locations for geocachers to find. This would be fun. Get the book in the hands of people who might not otherwise get the book. Downside? I have to hike to where the book is going to be placed. Would probably make a great Youtube video. Funny to watch. I’m not a great hiker and would probably fall a lot.
So, this one may be a little more of a day dream than an inspiration. I’d love to have Oprah read, endorse my book and have me on Super Soul Sunday. I had the vision of this happening after I sent her a lovely basket with the book, cd, goodies for while reading it and a One pendent, similar to the one my husband was inspired to make and I’m not supposed to know about. I see her wearing it as I sit on her couch. Might this happen? Who knows!
You may have noticed the them, all the inspirations I’ve had recently have been around One. I’m taking this to mean the universe is working overtime to help me out with the book launch. And trust me, I’ll take any help I can get. Which means, now through June 30th which is the day after the book launch party at the Tewksbury Lodge, I think I might end up taking a lot of showers.
When I share that I wrote a book, most respond: “But you are so busy. How did you find the time?”
They are right. I am busy. I have a vibrant and active toddler that I am constantly running after. My business is thriving, due to the fact like any successful business owner not only do I spend time seeing clients but also attending to my media presence. As a home owner, there are always projects to be done. And, as a wife, daughter, and friend, I try to be there for my friends and family.
Amid all this, I did manage to write a book. How did I do it?
It’s quite simple. I made it a PRIORITY.
Penning One was not only something I wanted to do, I felt driven to do. I knew that if I didn’t write this book, I would have regrets and be disappointed in myself. With this in mind, I found the time. I dedicated time in my schedule for writing. I am not the type of person who could take an hour or two every day to write. I tried it and found that as soon as I got on a roll, time was up. I needed chunks of time to allow the words to flow. To allow for this, there were several weeks where I did not see clients. Instead, I wrote. Every Day.
During my writing weeks, my family rented homes and went away. Why did we do this? It limited the number of distractions. These homes were in quiet, serene locations. In fact, one had no cell service. I was not distracted by noises around us. But, I also wasn’t distracted by the day to day chores such as the load of laundry that needed to be done or the sink full of dishes. I also wasn’t distracted by the home improvement projects that could be done. All I had to focus on was writing. That was my job for the week.
With that intention, I was able to get to business. I averaged eight to ten hours of writing a day, getting up early and staying up late. Fortunately, in order to avoid burn-out, I was able to enjoy family time in the afternoon. We went to museums and to parks. Reinvigorated, I was able to go back and write some more.
Being a priority meant I had to invest more than just time, I invested money. It cost money to go away and write. And more than just the expense of the rental property. During those weeks, I didn’t see clients. Unfortunately, as a small business owner when I don’t work I don’t get paid.
In addition to the costs in time, there are costs in publishing the book. I was blessed to have found reasonable ways to manage a great deal of the costs, but I have contactors to pay such as a graphic artist for a book cover, and printers to have copies of the book made. Costs add up.
There is no guarantee any of that money will be recouped. It’s a risk. But you know what, it doesn’t matter. Writing the book isn’t about the money or fame it could bring. It’s about sharing knowledge. Giving Spirit a voice in another way. Accomplishing a dream. And for that, it was worth it.
The creation of this book was a dream, and I saw it through. That’s an important lesson about making dreams a reality. If you just dream it, it may or may not happen. If you want that dream to come true, you have to see your work through to the end. Even if you don’t know if at the end, the outcome will be what you want it to be. It’s not about the outcome after all, it’s about the journey.
The journey of writing One was fun. Can you say your journey been enjoyable?
If you saw my video, you know that in June I am releasing a book. One: Unleashing the Energy that Connects Us All.
There is A LOT of work that goes into getting that done. From the editing, to cover design and book layout, to press releases, scheduling a book tour and book launch… lots to consider.
All of which occurs amid my already crazy life of parenting, seeing clients, teaching, filming and trying to carve out quality time for my friends, hubby and ME.
Needless to say, it has been a hectic few weeks. The stress has allowed my Ego, which I discuss at length in One, to rear its ugly head putting the following doubts in my head: Is the book any good? Is anyone going to really care? Is the information of value to people? Are people going to pick it up and feel like they have wasted their time and money?
These fears are raised because I know I am biased. I’ve spent months writing and have put my blood, sweat, tears, heart and soul into the book. I’m proud.
But that’s me. And, my husband doesn’t count either.
To put these fears and the ego to bed, I was picky about who I chose as my first set of reviewers. I needed people that I trusted to be kind, and yet at the same time critical. I didn’t need someone to fluff my ego only to find out by the copy editor that it was a crappy book. But, I also needed someone to be gentle as the book has truly been a labor of love. Ultimately, I needed honest feedback.
These were the brave folks who were not only selected, but stepped up to the task:
These folks were the first to see it, other than my husband. It was in rough shape. But, I was excited to find they LIKED IT… THEY REALLY DID.
Now there were a lot of comments and questions. And work to be done, but less than I expected. After a job with a tyrannical boss who loved her red (sometimes green) pen, I was ready for the worst. But, I didn’t have that. In some ways, I think I may have been harsher than they were. After getting it back I decided to cut two whole chapters!! Don’t fret, they are going in my next book… or the one after that.
Their comments put the fear to bed for a little while. Long enough to make the edits and get it to the copy editor.
Now that it is in her hands and I’m waiting, the fear is creeping back in. What if the book isn’t needed?
Spirit worked to alleviate this fear over the weekend at the Find Yourself Retreat. Throughout the weekend, there was insightful conversations. These conversations, initiated by the group of ladies who were looking to Find Themselves, were all topics covered in my book!
It got to a point where I felt guilty saying, “it’s in my book!” I wasn’t there to sell the book, but the questions raised were those that I sought to answer. Finding intuition is really about finding oneself. And over the weekend when I struggled to come up with another reference that truly answered the questions they had, I realized there wasn’t one. At least not one that broke it down simply.
Made me realize, maybe there is a place for my book… maybe I’m not just overly proud of myself…. And maybe, there was a reason I was inspired.
Want to be one of the first to get a copy? Click here to pre-order!
My father and step-mother live just north of Orlando. Not living near their only granddaughter, they are always itching to see her. As a result, each winter my husband, daughter and I go down to Florida to visit. It’s the perfect time… it’s not overly hot there and it’s usually cold and snowy here. A win-win.
While visiting Orlando this year, I noticed something I hadn’t noticed before. There are A LOT of psychics down there. Perhaps I noticed because I have been pondering extending my business into the Florida market. Or, because it is my industry. But I’m not kidding when I say I saw AT LEAST 25 unique psychic storefronts in strip malls throughout our travels around Florida.
I was happy to see the profession so strongly represented. But it struck me as odd as well. Here is why:
Lots of questions for me to ponder. Especially after a visit from my mother who is spending the winter on the Gulf Coast of Florida near Clearwater who not only noticed, but mentioned the SAME thing.
After consideration and a little bit of research, I’ve come to the following conclusions:
Overall, I’m torn over how I feel about all these shops. I love that individuals are operating so openly as it helps normalize intuition. I just hope and pray they are on the up and up to reinforce the positive nature of intuition and not leave a bad taste in a person’s mouth.
Additionally, if asked… I personally would not get a reading in one of these establishments, but that’s me. If I was to get a reading while visiting my folks in Orlando, I’d take the drive to Cassadaga or Elysian Fields or do a little research on the best medium in town. I tend to be fussy and look for the experience… I’m not sure these places would be that warm and fuzzy space I’d hope for. Then again, I could be surprised. <I’m not going to find out.>
In my last Blog, What it Takes to Become a Professional Medium, I spoke about the tactics I believe assisted me in having a successful business. It is my belief that by applying these tactics and sticking to it, anyone desiring moderate success in their business will achieve it.
And I wish for that success for my colleagues and students for I’m not going to lie, my work is incredible! Having the ability to touch individuals’ hearts and souls is amazing, I wish everyone had the opportunity to do that. But, I also realize that not everyone is cut out for that. Just like not everyone can be an all-star athlete or president, not everyone has the talent or ability to become a professional medium.
Unfortunately, over the last year I have seen several individuals take the leap from practicing mediumship to doing it semi-professionally, meaning it’s not a full-time job but they are charging money for a session, that in my opinion shouldn’t be.
Feeling guilty for holding this opinion, I did a lot of soul searching. I’ve asked myself, “Am I threatened? Do I worry they will take business away from me?” To which I can honestly say I’m not. I’ve also asked as many of these individuals have been students, “Do I have an ego, and do I want to keep people down to lift myself up?” And again, I can honestly say no. Then I asked, “Am I worried they will reflect poorly on me?” To this, I had to answer YES. Why?
The reason I worry it will reflect poorly on me is due to the feedback I’ve been hearing. I’ve heard:
Every time I hear feedback from individuals like this it makes me cringe. Why? Because these unprofessional and second-rate readers water down the field and cast a negative light on the profession. Many already hold the opinion that psychic mediums are con-artists. These individuals, even though I know are coming from the right place, perpetuate that belief. Which makes me sad.
Feeling this way, there are times I really want to say something to these individuals. Which I struggle with because I honestly believe that a person’s path will take them where they need to be. Is it my place to intervene? Or do they need to have the experience of reading professionally, even if it means being knocked down, to learn a lesson?
Unfortunately, I’m not God… so I don’t know. So, unless asked specifically, I have been keeping my mouth shut.
But here are some of my thoughts for those readers who reading this worry that I might be talking about them AND for anyone who has had a reading with second-rate reader.
If you are a reader just beginning to read professionally, be aware of your personal beliefs and attitudes. They do affect the reading. You as the reader are NOT always going to like the advice you may be giving an individual. And remember the reading is NOT about you. It’s about your client. If you find your reading is full of personal anecdotes, you really need to check in with yourself and your ego.
To the new reader, DO NOT argue with a client and insist that you are right and they are wrong. Even if you are sure a situation will work out a particular way, remember the client has free will. If they choose to apply what you are saying one way, you can encourage them to think of it in another way, but DO NOT argue with them. It will leave a bad taste in their mouth. And for the client, remember that no matter how much a reader insists upon something they are saying, ultimately you know yourself better. And more importantly, you have free will. In life, it is not the steps we make or the paths we take in life that are destined, it is the lessons we learn. Lessons can be learned in a multitude of ways.
If you are practicing as a medium, I encourage you to offer evidence to prove the existence of your client’s loved one. Don’t just say I have your grandfather and leave it. Describe the loved one. Their appearance, their voice, their personality, anything that loved one can provide you. My recommendation is 12-15 items. This is more than enough for the client to feel confident and trust you. If you don’t provide this, you could be telling them anything and they have nothing to assure you two really have connected. My advice to the client, be open to what the reader is saying. Their interpretation might not be exact. Remember that communication with the Spirit realm is a little like playing the telephone game.
If it is apparent that a client is not happy with the direction a session is going. Stop. Don’t continue to try to convince them you are right. Stop and offer to end the session and not charge them. Assure them it has nothing to do with them, but that you two may not be connecting. If you are the client and you are unhappy with the direction the reading is going, stop the reader and let them know you would like to end the reading. Don’t wait until the end, at that point the reader has spent their time with you and may not have realized you weren’t getting what they were saying. At this point it is frustrating to both of you. Stop them.
NOT A DESTINATION
For the new reader, remember that becoming a professional medium is NOT the end destination. You still have a lot of spiritual growth to do. I recommend you continue to take classes, read books, expand your mind. The more you learn, the better you can become. For the client, find out about the reader’s continued growth. If it appears they have stopped training, then they may have plateaued.
That’s my thoughts. Hope this helps both the new reader and the client.
As a teacher to many student mediums and healers hoping to take their skills to the next level and run a spiritual business, I often get asked, “Dawn, how did you become so successful? What’s your trick?”
I am honored they look up to me. I also feel blessed to be able to do what I do every day. And there really is no trick, but these are some of the reasons I feel as though I’ve had success in a tricky business.
First and foremost, I tell people that success doesn’t happen overnight. I have been reading professionally since 2007. That’s almost TEN years. I can’t believe it has been that long as it seems like just yesterday I did my first paid reading out of my mother’s living room. It also surprises many of my colleagues. They are aware I have been around for some time, but because I am still younger than many of them, they find it hard to believe I have been working my business that long. But I have. And, ten years gives the business a lot of time to grow.
At the beginning, my business didn’t support a full-time income. In fact, it wasn’t until a little more than three years ago, that I jumped into it with both feet. Prior to that, I juggled my business with a full-time job. In juggling the two, it was not uncommon for me to work 70-80 hours in a week between the two. I worked a lot. Fortunately, I was a little younger, didn’t have a child and had a lot more energy.
Now that I am established, I can pick and choose when I want to work and what environments I want to work in. I have stopped doing psychic fairs due to drama and intense hours, and have transitioned to regular office hours. This is made possible by the client base I created by doing many, many, many psychic fairs, renaissance festivals and Pagan Pride events. To participate in these events required a lot of time, travel, and patience… but I did it. For a long time, I took any gig I could get to get my name out there. I’m glad I did, it paid off.
There is the adage that you must give a little to get a little. In terms of business, to make money you must spend money. Starting a business is never cheap. There are overhead expenses such as space rental or fees to participate in events. If you participate in events, there are a lot of items you will need inclusive of: marketing materials such as business cards and pamphlets; décor to set you apart from other readers or healers; and, any materials you need for your craft. In addition, you will likely have equipment costs such as a computer. Add it all up and this can all be VERY expensive. Unfortunately, this money is not made back right away. In fact, many don’t make money on their first few events. Despite that, I have found that it is important to not go cheap. Patrons can tell if you are being cheap, and it can be a turn off.
If you become a professional medium, that means that you have a business to operate. Operating a business is not all fun and games. The time spent with clients is incredibly rewarding emotionally and by the fact that at the end of it you are paid for your services. But in addition to this time, hours and hours of time are spent on activities that are critical to keeping the business running that an individual doesn’t get paid for. A rule of thumb for small business is only 30% of time is spent providing a service, while 60% is spent on marketing and 10% on operations. In my business, the 70% of time is spent returning phone calls and scheduling appointments; marketing the business which includes scheduling Facebook posts, writing content for this Blog and a monthly newsletter, filming for my YouTube Channel, etc.; and, I must keep up with my bookkeeping and accounting. Many hours are spent each week doing this work. While it doesn’t equate to money in my pocket, I know it makes a difference because my clients comment on it.
If you have read my Blogs or watched my YouTube Channel, you know the strategic planner in me LOVES goals. And I credit them with my success. The goals I set give me milestones to work towards. Rather than spinning my wheels going into many different directions, I have a clear vision and focus on what will bring me success. I’m not a jack of all trades, master of none. Instead, I focus my energies towards becoming the best I can become in one realm.
I have the support of my family and friends. My friends and family opened their homes when I would travel for events early on. My mom and aunt babysit my daughter each week so I can see clients. My stepfather who upon hearing my dreams, for Christmas purchases a class to provide me with skills and steps towards being able to achieve it. My stepmom and my dad by proxy, follow everything I do on social media and whenever I participate in a podcast tune in. And most importantly my husband. He is my rock, without him I don’t know what I would do. He returns my calls for me, implements new technology such as my online scheduler to minimize the amount of work we have, films and edits my videos, drives me to all my events, and sacrifices his own career and personal success to see my business grow. I’m so fortunate to have so many people in my life that not only support me, but believe that what I do makes a difference.
And finally, I don’t want to dismiss the importance of luck. I have put a lot of work into my business, but I have also been incredibly lucky. There have been so many times where things have just fallen into place that have made the work easy. I am blessed.
When I started my career in the metaphysical community more than nine years ago, my colleagues on the psychic fair circuit told me, “If you are going to do the fairs, you NEED a banner. You should contact Linda Donaldson. She is a graphic designer and she is the best!”
I procrastinated. At the time, I was still only dipping my toe in the water and was uncertain I really wanted to be reading people. With that in mind, I didn’t want to spend the money on an expensive sign. More importantly, I didn’t know who this Linda was or how to get ahold of her. So I continued to do fairs without a sign.
As I continued to do more and more events which resulted in more and more private readings, the uncertainty began to turn into clarity that I really did love doing readings. It was about that time that I began looking around the fair circuit and realize that in order to look professional, I really did need a sign. But at that point, I still didn’t know who this Linda that everyone was talking to was.
Then I finally met her.
At a fair in Lewiston, I was placed next to Bruce Donaldson. He is a wonderful tarot reader and healer who also just so happens to be Linda’s husband. She wasn’t there on Saturday, but on Sunday she showed up to front Bruce’s table. As fate would have it, it was a slow Sunday so she and I had a chance to talk.
She is a funny, charismatic woman who immediately made me comfortable. Before I knew it she was talking to me about creating a sign and by the end of the fair I was handing over a check as down payment.
Within weeks she had me a proof of the design. She did a BEAUTIFUL job. It had elements that resonated with me such as the tree of life, the phases of the moon, celtic text, a turtle and hare. She was inspired.
This banner became my logo. I used it on my business cards and brochures. The CDs clients get to take home with them were adorned by it. My husband even modified my website to have the elements incorporated.
While I still love the sign, over the last year I began to feel it didn’t tell my story. It began to feel too busy with too much going on. I found myself yearning for a new, fresh and clean image.
Knowing that Linda prided herself on my sign – she has told me more than once she thinks it is one of the best she has ever done – I hesitated in contacting her. And rather than going directly to her, I opted decided I’d try Fiverr.
THAT WAS A BIG MISTAKE. Now, I bet they do fantastic work for some but unfortunately the person I went with lacked luster. Rather than offering me a new look, the designer took what I already had and just retooled it. I ultimately walked away without a logo and $125 poorer.
With my tail between my legs after that big OOPS, I contacted Linda. She was happy to help. We went through the same process as before. You see she talks with each client asking them a host of questions. She asked me about colors and themes, my likes and dislikes, and if there was anything I really didn’t want.
It then sat. She (and Spirit) noodled it. You see, I believe mediumship comes in various formats and her ability to create graphics is the way Spirit speaks to her. And she, fortunately, doesn’t push just waits for the inspiration to hit.
Knowing her process, I waited patiently. And when I got my first rounds of designs to review, I knew she was on the right path. They needed a little retooling, but on the right path.
She played with them and would send me edits. But nothing was quite coming out just right. Then one day she sent me one that I had never seen before with the comment, “I know this is different… but what do you think.”
I LOVED IT.
And with minimal tweaking, it was ready to go.
She works miracles, because quite honestly when we started – I HAD NO IDEA WHAT I WANTED. All I knew was that I wanted something different that was concise, clean and not too fluffy. That’s what I got!
Want to check out my new look? Check out my website, www.revdawnlynn.com
Dawn Lynn is an EveryDay medium. She lives and breathes via her intuition, which as a fourth generation intuitive from a family of Spiritualists came easily. Her abilities became apparent in early childhood and were cultured by a supportive family. Through her Blogs and Vlogs, she wants to help you become the EveryDay medium too.