In last week’s Blog, I spoke about my grandfather’s passing. It occurred on Thanksgiving, which, while sad, is not particularly uncommon. Many of us lose individuals around the holidays. I personally have lost both grandfathers, two great aunts, a dear friend and a step brother.
Why might this be so?
Last week, I discussed the common things people experience and do before they pass: They See the Other Side; They are Visited by Deceased Loved Ones; They Check Items Off Their Bucket List; and, They Say Good-Bye. Many of these are accomplished during the holidays. Let’s take a look…
The last two, checking items off their bucket lists and saying good-bye to loved ones, are the most easily demonstrated.
Checking Items Off Their Bucket List – How often do you hear an individual who knows the end is near hope to make it to a specific date or occurrence. They may say, “I hope make it to Christmas” or “I’d love to make it to the end of the year.” This arbitrary date becomes a concrete and specific goal or item on the bucket list that is attainable. But, once they hit that date or occurrence… what’s next? Some don’t know. And for some, hitting this goal becomes an accomplishment allowing them to be ready to let go of the earthly plane.
Saying Good-Bye – During the winter holidays (or any holiday for that matter), we tend to see family members and friends we haven’t seen in a while, perhaps since this time last year! Feeling joyful and nostalgic, we carve out time for those we love that we may not at other times during the year. I know I do. Because of that, the opportunity to visit with loved ones is easier for the individual who knows they are passing. It takes less energy to gather everyone and say good-bye. Instinctively knowing this is likely the last time they will see a loved one, it gives them the opportunity to pass in peace.
As mentioned, it is obvious how the first two are accomplished during the holiday season. The next two are a little less apparent.
They See the Other Side – When I described the other side last week, this was explained as a physical ability to get that glimpse of the other-side. To see the other-side, however, an individual doesn’t just see it with their naked eye, they can also feel it in their heart. That’s what happens this time of year. Because regardless of one’s faith… Pagan, Christian, Buddhist, Jewish, etc… the holidays we celebrate remind us that out of the darkness comes the light. This light, this heaven, brings peace, love, joy and most of all hope. Hope that there is something bigger at play and that the universal God, whatever you call it, saves us. This thought brings comfort to individuals here, but especially those who are passing whose faith may have waivered. It reminds them that there is more to life than what is here. Not only that, the faith and hope provides a glimpse of what the other-side may be like… making passing less scary.
Visits from Loved Ones – Again, last week I described this as visits that may have been with the naked eye or in dreams. During the holidays, while individuals may not see their deceased loved ones, during the holidays it is impossible to not be visited by their memories. It might be stories families told around the dinner table, written in the cookie recipe you make or traditions you keep, and maybe even be heirloom decorations that are pulled out. These memories bring our loved ones close to our heart. And we yearn to be closer with them. I see this all the time… I’m busiest around Christmas and Easter. That yearning for reconnection can make passing easier.
While this just scratching the surface of why it is not uncommon for people to pass around the holidays, it can hopefully bring comfort in knowing that many pass because they are happy and have found peace.
November is a month that is bittersweet for me. I love Thanksgiving. As we prepare for the holidays, I am overwhelmed with gratitude for all the blessings in my life (check me out at Instagram to view my 30 Days of Gratitude Challenge). Unfortunately, November is also tainted with a sadness. Both my grandfathers and my step-brother passed around the holiday (for the story of my step-brother, click here).
You are probably thinking, “Wow! So much death around the holidays – how sad!” It actually isn’t uncommon for loved ones to pass around the holidays, I’ll talk about that a little more in a future blog.
And to be honest, even though I grew up knowing my paternal grandfather passed on Thanksgiving, it didn’t phase me. I never knew him. In fact, the first time my mother “met” him was at his funeral. My parents were planning on travelling to NYC that Thanksgiving and announcing their engagement, but instead of celebrating the happy news they were celebrating my grandfather’s sudden death. He had been suffering symptoms while preparing Thanksgiving dinner. Convinced to see his doctor, he suffered a massive heartache while sitting in his doctor’s office.
His passing was just part of his story. It just was.
My maternal grandfather’s passing, on the other hand, was much harder. I knew him. We were close. And while he was ill, he had lung cancer, and we KNEW he was dying, we didn’t expect for him to go so quickly. In fact, being as his birthday was just a couple days after Thanksgiving and we knew it would be his last, we had a large birthday party planned.
He didn’t make it. And that was hard.
It wasn’t the concept of his death, however, that was hard. I’d had family members pass before. I’d even had a friend I’d known since elementary school pass the year before. So I was keenly aware of the concept of death and what it meant.
What was different about this was witnessed some of the things a dying person experiences that assists them with their transition.
Here is what I learned from my grandfather’s passing:
When my grandfather told me he loved me, I knew I was never going to see him alive again. And sure enough, less than an hour later, the phone rang. I remember sitting at the top of the stairs and starting to cry before my mom even got off the phone. It had been my grandmother letting us know “Al was gone.” When they arrived home he went upstairs to his apartment, she stayed downstairs to let the dog out. When she made her way upstairs, he was already gone.
He was ready. He had done the things he wanted to.
Each November, these memories flood back. They are bittersweet… and while sadness floods in at first, I am immediately reminded and comforted that we had that one last Thanksgiving. Love you Grandpa!
One of the most annoying aspects of my work is that messages from the universe come in the form of symbols. It could be a song playing on the radio, a cloud formation in the sky, the repetition of a theme or it could be the repeated appearance of something in your life… like the deer that for the past few months I have been seeing EVERYWHERE.
At first I dismissed their appearance because they appeared in the typical, more rural places. My office is across from a state park and there are open as well as wooded tracts of land all over the place down there. Of course, there would be deer around.
As the sign continued, and the deer appeared on the side of the state and county roads, I rationalized that the deer were coming out because they were looking for a food source. The summer was dry, and now that it is getting cooler they are looking for food wherever they can get it. Not only that, hunting season had begun, so perhaps they were avoiding the hunters. That’s why I was seeing so many deer.
At this point my husband tried to tell me, “Dawn, you are the one seeing the deer… not me, maybe you should pay attention to it.”
I didn’t. And that’s when I saw two deer less than a mile from my home on Harlem Road. This was like getting hit in the head with a two-by-four. Why? Well if you aren’t familiar with Harlem Road, it is a busy thoroughfare like Main Street USA. For two deer to be standing on the sidewalk at about 5pm when traffic was at its heaviest, was shocking.
At that point I took notice. But I didn’t understand the sign.
What did I do? Like any good Millennial, I googled “meaning deer animal totem.”
What did I get? A bunch of stuff that made no sense. The descriptions spoke about “gentleness” and “innocence” as well as “love” and “compassion.” All traits I admire, but I couldn’t understand what in my life would be occurring that was so important that I apply these concepts to. As I already do my best, and think I am pretty good at, applying these attributes to my interactions with clients and those closest to me.
I was stumped. I was frustrated. And, in that moment could empathize with how my students just beginning to navigate the world of Spirit and symbols must feel knowing they are getting a message but having no way to interpret it.
Frustrated, I ignored the signs. Did they stop coming. Of course not. Spirit pesters. Don’t believe me, check out this article.
Today, after seeing a six-point buck and then on a separate occasion, witnessing six doe feeding, I had a breakthrough. I understood what the deer meant.
How did I do that? I did exactly what I tell my students and clients to do – isn’t it great when you listen to you own advice? I asked myself, when I think about deer what do I think of? What do they represent to me?
This is what I realized. When I think about deer I don’t visualize Bambi and Thumper, nor do I think about sitting in the woods in camouflage hunting deer for meat. Rather, I envision deer being displaced from their natural environment, searching for a new home. I visualize them in people’s backyards. I visualize them frantic and afraid as a new road cuts through what had once been their home. Why is this the imagery I see? Why do deer bring these emotions forward? Because as a young adult, that is exactly what I witnessed that occur.
You see, the town I grew up in, while not rural was very suburban. There were acres of unpopulated and undisturbed land. These vast tracts of wooded land by my house, began to be developed about twenty years ago. What was once undisturbed, is now one of the most hopping retail centers in the area populated with a cinema, three restaurants and more than twenty shops. While we humans benefited, the wildlife did not.
When I see deer, that feeling of being expelled, placed oneself outside of one’s comfort zone and needing to reestablish oneself is what comes to mind.
With that in mind, when I dissected the symbol in terms of my life it finally began to make sense. Why? Let me explain. You see, both my husband and I are reimagining our businesses right now (always). Right now, I particularly feel displaced. But like the deer who find their way, so will we.
Additionally, something I noted today was the appearance of sixes; one being the six-point buck and then with the six doe. As I have a fondness for numerology, I was pleased to see the sixes. Six represents balance and harmony. Not only that, numerologically, both my birthdate AND my name becomes sixes. Because the numbers are congruous, I take that as a sign that I am heading on the right path. Despite my current trepidation, uncertainty and hesitancy.
So when it comes to symbols, sometimes you have to think outside the box. Fortunately, Spirit is always there with you to help.
Please share any of your stories about signs in the comments below. I’d love to hear them!
The election, it is tomorrow. If you are like most people, you are fed up, can’t wait for the election to be over and don’t want to talk about it. Yet, despite your efforts to avoid the topic… you can’t. It’s on billboards and lawn signs, on the radio and television, in your mail and Facebook feed, and on the tip of everyone’s tongue.
Surprisingly, it is a conversation that comes up a lot in readings. You’d be surprised how many people at the end of their reading ask, “any idea what the outcome of the election is going to be?” I’ve even had people ask my intuitive daughter, “Trump or Clinton?”
I don’t know. She doesn’t know. Even if I did, I wouldn’t say. But fortunately, I don’t.
In fact, knowing has been further complicated for me because at different times in my life I have had feelings that BOTH candidates would be president. Around the time the first George Bush was running for president and Trump was still married to Ivana, I remember thinking he was going to be president someday. But, I also remember thinking during the Clinton/Monica Lewinski scandal around the time when Primary Colors came out that Hillary would be president at some point.
How do I explain this? Well, while I was a child that was intuitive and supported, I was not trained or mature enough to navigate the nuances of premonitions and insights. Not savvy at readings the signs at the time, I could have been observing the election. It’s also very likely that, since the future is always a moving target, at the different points in time each had the opportunity to become president.
And with those thoughts, I digress. Especially since, as I mentioned, I don’t have any idea who is going to prevail at the end of the day. And quite honestly, while I have my preference, I don’t want to talk about the candidates. There is enough of that occurring in the media. Nor do I want to talk about the issues… although I WISH the issues would have gotten more air time.
But unfortunately, the issues didn’t get air time because the candidates have been busy degrading one another. It occurred in the primaries. And it has continued through the general election – both on a national and local level. The mudslinging has created an energy that is vile. Neither party has followed diplomatic decorum.
The lack of diplomacy in the election scares me. These are the people who will be representing our values and interests on a national, statewide and local level. Our politicians are the individuals who are supposed to be skilled in negotiating and finding compromise. Shouldn’t our hope be that our adversaries respect them for fairness and diplomacy? As the quote goes “honey catches more flies than vinegar.”
And how has this impacted our culture?
From my personal experience, in the last month, I have seen an increase in inconsideration and rudeness among individuals. Everything from a truck pulling a tractor turning head on into my husband and my car. We were stopped at a stop sign mind you. And in doing so, our car was pushed off the road. The driver’s response as he further pinned us on the side of the street, “you are in my way.” To a woman standing in front of me at a grocery store saying to the cashier, “Please shut up. I don’t want to talk to you.” I guess we could find the positive in that she said please?
Are individuals being more hurtful to one another because speaking one’s mind is valued more than being kind? And being hurtful is acceptable? Has emotional and verbal abuse become status quo? And whomever has the wittiest, harshest response – regardless of truth – wins?
If this is the case, to what end? Being hurtful doesn’t make anyone feel good. The person receiving the insult feels beaten down. And the person dishing the insult often feels guilty or unsatisfied. Even the people who may be observing the interaction are negatively impacted by the exchange. And, in many cases the truth is lost and perception is king.
For example, in the grocery store, there was a palpable tension. As the smile left the cashier’s face, it was apparent she was hurt. I felt icky and felt myself stiffen and shift awkwardly, as did the person behind me. Now yes, the cashier was a little annoying. More talkative than was necessary and it was holding up the line. BUT, the cashier was trying to be friendly and there was no need for the coldness… no matter how bad a day the person ahead of me was having.
Witnessing this, I felt compelled to change the energy and bring positivity into the space. What did I do? Noticing the woman behind me only had a couple items. I added them to my order. It brought her joy. The smile returned to the register operator’s face. And then the cashier told me, “Ma’am, you are a good lady. You just earned some bonus points with the big guy. Karma is a real.” Hearing a stranger talk about karma made me smile. It was simple.
That type of world is the world I want to live in. Unfortunately, come election day, I don’t think the candidates who win and become our representatives are going to create that world for us. That is up to us. So, I want to encourage you to choose your candidate wisely and go out and VOTE tomorrow. More importantly, I also what to urge you to be kind. Rather than stoop to the levels we see our candidates at, next time you find yourself wanting to say something hurtful or find yourself judging a person or situation, stop yourself. As you stop yourself, I encourage you to smile and do something nice. Each act of kindness makes the world a better place and the ripple effect is amazing.
Dawn Lynn is an EveryDay medium. She lives and breathes via her intuition, which as a fourth generation intuitive from a family of Spiritualists came easily. Her abilities became apparent in early childhood and were cultured by a supportive family. Through her Blogs and Vlogs, she wants to help you become the EveryDay medium too.