Unfortunately, not all people in my field have the same restraint. I was witness to the unsolicited shoving of ideals upon another the other day. It made me cringe.
My dear friend and her husband were looking for oils and/or crystals to assist him in healing. You see, a couple years ago he sustained an injury while on the job and hasn’t been right since. He’s seen MANY doctors. Undergone MANY treatments and procedures. NOTHING has worked. And he recently received a diagnosis with the prognosis of it being unlikely he will ever be the same again.
Seeing her husband in constant pain and unwilling to accept that nothing else can be done, my open-minded friend is exploring alternative solutions. To say her husband is skeptical of these alternative solutions would be an understatement, yet he humors her (not that he really has any choice).
Knowing my familiarity with the holistic world and at a loss of where to begin with alternative treatments, a few weeks ago my friend asked my opinion. Knowing her husband’s stubbornness and skepticism, and worrying some options would leave him thinking it was all a bunch of hooey, I recommended things like acupuncture, cranial sacral massage and oils. All things he could plainly see and feel, with the thought that he could eventually have Reiki, BioGenesis, Qi Gong or some other form of energetic healing.
With that in mind, my friend brought her husband and I to a spiritual store to pick up some of the items we discussed. While there, she asked my opinions. Overhearing the conversation, the shopkeeper appropriately jumped in and began offering advice such as, “Why not smell the oils, you’ll know what’s right and what’s not from that” and “Let me see what I can find to give you a little more insight.”
It was at that point another patron butted into the conversation as well. She asked questions as to what was wrong and (without hearing the whole story) started giving her advice. Very quickly it became clear she was not a fan of traditional medicine AND she was a Reiki practitioner.
It also became clear my friend’s husband was shutting down. He didn’t want to be in the store to begin with, now he was receiving advice from someone who didn’t know him or what he had been through! Advice, by the way, that was basically telling him to “think your pain away.” Surgery hadn’t helped. The pain pills weren’t helping. He crossed his arms and began to back away from the woman who was speaking and towards the door.
Seeing her husband’s reaction and fearing she was going to lose any interest he had in alternative solutions, my friend said to the woman on numerous occasions, “Yes... we plan on trying that. But, small steps.”
Unfortunately, the woman was oblivious and just kept pushing energy healing, specifically Reiki.
Now mind you, I appreciate the woman’s enthusiasm and beliefs. And, I admire her ability to sell herself and her services. But, there is a fine line between being confident and informational and being pushy to the point of obnoxious. In my opinion she unfortunately crossed that line, likely without even knowing it.
What she also likely didn’t realize, is they both lost all faith in her and it is highly unlikely they would go to her for a treatment. She would have been better to listen, than speak. And educate by answering questions, rather than preaching.
I was raised with the adage, “Don’t talk about money, politics or religion and you won’t offend anyone.” And, that is what I try to do. Of the three, the only one I feel passionate about is religion/spirituality. But, living by this adage, I don’t talk about my beliefs unless asked. When I do talk about them – I make sure it is clear that they are MY opinion. I don’t force them upon anyone. And, I think that’s why people honor my opinion. I wish others in the field saw this. But alas, we all come to realizations in our own time.
To help people come to this realization, or if you find yourself preaching a belief, I encourage you to pause or ask them to pause and listen. You’ll be amazed what you find out by doing that.